My Affinity

My Affinity

Where is the man brave enough to love all of me?

When I meet my affinity – the man with the courage to accept, embrace and appreciate my exquisitely quirky nature, I will be grateful it never worked out with anyone else.

When that euphoric moment arrives, I will know.

When I meet my forever man, I will finally realize that those men in my past I thought were perfect for me…really weren’t. I will remember them fondly, as the amazing and elite gentlemen they are, but they will no longer occupy my mind and heart.

I operate with intensity. I experience deep emotion. I have a wild and unpredictable personality. Sometimes, I supress the best parts of me, because few men know what to do with the radiance of a spirit like mine.

But he will! He will find it impossible not to love the passionate, creative, inspiring woman I am.

I have fallen more times than I can count, but I always find the strength to rise, stronger than before. I have the courage to admit when I’m wrong and ask forgiveness. I have yet to face a challenge, illness, tragedy, transgression or heartache I didn’t overcome and will continue to do so with grace and humility.

I strive every day to be authentic and to re-connect with my deepest calling, which is larger than any singular life experience.

I am destined for deep and profound love and when it arrives, I will surrender myself to it.

So, when I stumble upon that brave awakened man, who becomes consumed by my essence and is able to fully endure my intensity, I will know that this is the man who possesses the courage every other lover I had before lacked.

THAT!

THAT!

When he stares at you every time you look away.

When you watch him walk out of the room.

When he’d rather be with you than anyone else.

When just hearing his voice say your name makes you smile.

When he wants to wake you up, but wants to watch you sleep even more.

When his laugh makes you laugh.

Take It Back!

Take It Back!

Take it back!
Take it all back, please.
Take back that first lingering look.
Take back the kisses that changed the way my heart beats.
Take me back to the night we met…
This time don’t say yes!
Just let me leave.
Ignorant to the dream of a future with you in it.

 

Fixated

Fixated

I’m fixated on something that doesn’t exist! You’re in my heart, but I’m not in yours. And that’s a painful realization, but what’s more distressing is that while searching for something that would make you crave me as much as I crave you, I’ve lost myself.